Simply Hating Valentines Day!

I'm going to be honest, I am NOT the biggest fan of Valentines Day! If there was an Ebenezer Scrooge of Valentines Day then Bah-Humbug, that would be me, this girl, right here!

You wanna tell me you love me, great, tell me on a day NOT marked on the calendar with a little red heart!

You wanna bring me flowers, that's sweet, just DON'T be one of those suckers standing in line with a bouquet that one can only hope is NOT the "last of the pickings"!

Bring me chocolate, I love chocolate, but I love MY chocolate, not some crazy assortment shaped like a heart with a guide printed on the inside that I have to follow to make sure I'm not about to eat something gross!!!!

Finally, and this is my biggest pet peeve, stuffed animals are for children! And for heavens sake we have enough toys in our house, so just walk right on by that 10 foot Teddy Bear and straight into the Wine and Spirits store!

And just FYI if you must celebrate this hideous day, be smart and do it the following day, all of that crap listed above will be like 70% off!!!

Maybe it's the whole commercialization of the day that turns me off or the fact that red and pink really CLASH and yet we are throwing them together in the name of LOVE! I don't know what it is that makes me hate it so much, but I do!

However, if you must declare your love for me on the same day as every other Tom, Dick and Harry then here's just a few ideas of some gifts that would really make me happy!

#10 Wash my car, it's beyond filthy, the kids are drawing dirt murals on the back hatch window!!!

#9 Fill up the gas tank so I don't have to, it's cold and that sucks!

#8 Clean out the junk drawer beacause I'm never going to get around to that!

#7 Make dinner AND do the dishes, no tag teaming Dinner Duty on V-Day!

#6 Give the dog a bath, please, he stinks and there's something weird hanging from his tail!

#5 Wash, Dry, Fold AND Put away a few loads of laundry, remember it takes all four steps to consider this a complete success!!!

#4 Finish a project or fix something that you've been meaning to fix for a while, if you need help with this I can list a few (dozen) things!

#3 Give the kids a bath and take over the whole bedtime routine SOLO...I repeat SOLO!

#2 Give me a glass of wine, some bubble bath, my phone with a playlist loaded with my favorite music and promise to keep away all tiny intruders!!!

#1 QUIET...just a couple hours of quiet!

So really Dude, Just keep it SIMPLE, don't be stressing, I know you love me...February 14th is just another day in paradise!