Simply Seeing YOU...The Soldier's Wife

I see you...you there, a baby in one arm and the other one flung around your husband's neck. I see you, forehead to forehead, trying to whisper an "I Love You" for everyday you're about to be apart. I see you, prying your screaming toddler away from their father, they just don't understand this kind of good-bye. I see your tears fall and I feel your heart break. I see you watching the buses roll away. I see you, standing there surrounded by crowds of people waving and blowing kisses, you see their mouths moving but you can't hear them can you? You've never felt so lost, you've never felt so alone. I see you pray "Please bring him back home to me..."

I see you, I was you, I am YOU!

"Well you knew what you were signing up for," those who have never been where you are will try and tell you...but I'm here to tell you, NO you didn't! All you did was fall in love with a boy who dreamed of serving his country! Your husband spent weeks, months, even years training and preparing for his job. There is no training or preparing for all that you do! Your husband has a unit, a team to help him carry out his duties, you don't. Those who have never been in your shoes can't see that, but I do...I see YOU!

You're still grabbing one too many plates for dinner, parking your mini van next to a truck that hasn't moved for months, you're sleeping by the telephone in a cold empty bed, wearing one of his old PT shirts he left behind because for a split second you might catch an old familiar scent, even if it's sweat, you don't care, it's him! You're avoiding the news like the plague and switching the stations on the radio because, sure enough, Carrie Underwood will be belting out that song that you just can't listen to right now.

You're counting down hours of days that just won't pass and marking off days of months that just seem to stand still, you don't want to wish away time you just wish he was home!

Until then, I see you...I see people meaning well but asking you the most ridiculous questions... "Are you lonely, are you scared, do you worry?" I see you watch young couples walk down the street holding hands, you hear the lady in the grocery store complain about her husband working long hours and that she could use a break....I get it, I've been there!

You're up in the middle of the night to a noise and it's up to you to check it out, you are the only thing standing between you're sleeping children and whatever made the noise down the hall. You're the nurturer and the protector! Some days you feel strong and the next day you feel abandon. You're the one left behind and the other half of your heart is oceans away.

But then, like it tends do, life goes on and eventually you find yourselves back together, once again. You think life is back to normal and you can just pick up right where you left off. But I still see you. I see you struggling because your roles have been shattered for so long that he doesn't know where he fits in anymore and it starts a fight. I see you watching the man that came home not acting quite like the man who left. I see you watching him toss and turn at night, knowing his hurting but he won't talk about it...I see you watch other couples just like you call it quits and get divorced and you get it, you completely understand and the fact that you do scares you to death.

So I say this to you, one soldiers wife to another, when you feel like you're reaching the end of your rope, reach for each other. You have to hold on and power through. You have to talk until you think you can't talk anymore, then take a deep breath and start talking again! If you think you need marriage counseling, you might, it's out there, do it! Just as you had to fight to make it on your own, fight to stay together! Always remember, keep turning towards each other, never turn away. Bottom line, you are strong, you are amazing, you are part of an elite group of women that have been serving this country for as long as our husbands have been fighting for it...

You are a soldier's wife!